This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize