MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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