There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Couch. On fire.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
