ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize