dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
sex in a hospital.. check
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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