i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
