Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Someone shit on the floor
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
