Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
