We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
nutella sex= disaster
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
