TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
