i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
When are your genitals available?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
