If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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