When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize