he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
