your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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