dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
