I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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