My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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