Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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