You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize