My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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