YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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