Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
