Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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