I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
