Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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