pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
