Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
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I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
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And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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