we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
