They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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