sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
