gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize