kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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