sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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