well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
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I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
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you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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