haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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