i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
You pole danced in your parka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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