You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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