I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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