how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize