where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I accidentally had phone sex last night
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I supernannyed him into submission
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize