i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Randomize
