She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
