Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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