He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize