The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
