I must be too annoying 4 u.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
