In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize
