I don't remember. Are we still dating?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
