The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
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