We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
