found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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